dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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