dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
