K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
