yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
