I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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