Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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