Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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