apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
