mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Randomize
