I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
