I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
