i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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