just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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