she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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