ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
