Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
