You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
you traded sex for a burrito?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
