I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
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