Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I have tasted many bathrooms
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