I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
