That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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