I've blown a few things in my day
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
