Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
she smelled like a LAN party
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
