They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
She's JV to your varsity
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I will pee on everything he values.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
