I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
