so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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