i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
