theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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