I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
