I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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