i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
