My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
