i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
two words...techno handjob
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Randomize
