Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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