Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
