thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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