i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize