she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
either way he was missing a nipple.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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