I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
