Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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