You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize