so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
