4 words: hood of his car
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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