dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
