The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
it's like iHOP with fire
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
