it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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