He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
