Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize