the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
