everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
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