I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
