Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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