The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
